Meeting Up, Messing Up

Met up with some American Asians today in Buffalo Wild Wings. Had a lot of boneless wings and some with bones. Went to Five Guys and had some fries with Ivan. Proceeded to Ben & Jerry to have ice cream after that. Came back to the Duderstadt Center with no specific purpose, but managed to finish part 1 of my ME 250 homework. Starting to like this course because of the design part, which is interesting and a bit challenging. This semester has been quite okay so far, with not much homework or rather, I managed to finish early. Hopefully it won't get too hectic in the coming future. Kind of being bothered by Sindy's matter lately. It has been a month, and yet people are still questioning her or me. No idea what all these people are up to. One thing that I don't like about the church, is how things pass around in the speed of light. Accountability is important, but I personally think that the focus of the accountability should be on God, and not to please man. Making assumptions is just not the right thing to do sometimes. Sigh... Hopefully I am doing the correct thing now. Please understand.

Synchronizing My Heartbeats with God's

Came to realize that a lot of times, I've been lenient to myself. When my heart needs to be softened, I hold on and resist it. When my heart needs to be hardened, the other part of me just relents and refuses to cooperate. Yet I know that sometimes, things just need to be done. God I pray that you harden and soften my heart accordingly. Synchronize my heartbeats with yours, and let me live for your glory.

Life is Like a Camera

Life is like a camera. Just focus on what is important and capture the good times, develop from the negatives and if things don't work out, just take another shot.

Meeting an American

Had a dinner with Kyle in a sit-down restaurant somewhere beyond Downtown, Ann Arbor tonight. This guy has been to more than 30 countries, went through more than 8 transitions in his life, and he lives to tell his story, impacting young lives as much as he can (he is just 25 years old this year).

I remember the first time I met him in a Church Congregational retreat, and he introduced himself to our life group. At the end of his introduction I looked around and found every one looking at him either with jaws opened or eyes blinking in disbelief. The things that he has gone through, probably only God and him himself know. The journey that he had gone through in his 25 years totally blew my mind off. Knowing more than 6 languages, having 8 or 9 close families, etc... all these things contribute to the unique mindset that he has, yet when he shares his story with other people, he is open and real.

One of the things that I learn from him, is that I really need to step out of my comfort zone and stop mingling with just Asians and Christians. There's no point of mixing around with Christians, when my purpose in life is to reach out to the lost souls out there. There is no point of mixing around with Asians, when I already understand a large portion of their cultures, norms, and beliefs. God planned for me to come to the USA for a purpose, and although I might not be able to see the whole picture of the plan, I know that one of the reasons for me to be here is to gain experience and open up my eyes that have been closed for the past 20 years. I was thrown a challenge to make American friends and to get to know them well in the next half year to come. I took the challenge with faith.

It was really an eye opener for me. I listened to his story about his past, about his childhood, and I learned that God gives, and God takes away. More than often we gain something, and at the same time we lose another. There is no fairness in life, no mercy in some human beings.Yet if we can take each hardship and turbulence as a learning process, we can really, really learn a lot in our lives. Study is important, but I came to realize that the experience here will probably be the most useful thing that I can gain throughout my three years of university life. Another thing is, I realized how much things that I can learn from a single dinner with someone. I can literally grasp a general picture of his life! I used to think that I need a lot of time to get to know someone's life, and I need to get really close for hearts to be opened. Yet the rendezvous shows me how easily people can share their stories, if one party decides and is willing to break down the barrier first. Here is to a great semester ahead. Life is but a learning process. Be tough, be strong, take a step out of your comfort zone, and the next thing you know, both of your feet are out. Take heart, and by faith, I can do all things through the Almighty One! :)

The Resolution in the Movie "Courageous"

THE RESOLUTION

 

I DO solemnly resolve before God to take full responsibility for myself, my wife, and my children.

 

I WILL love them, protect them, serve them, and teach them the Word of God as the spiritual leader of my home.

 

I WILL be faithful to my wife, to love and honor her, and be willing to lay down my life for her as Jesus Christ did for me.

 

I WILL bless my children and teach them to love God with all of their hearts, all of their minds, and all of their strength.

 

I WILL train them to honor authority and live responsibly.

 

I WILL confront evil, pursue justice, and love mercy.

 

I WILL pray for others and treat them with kindness, respect, and compassion.

 

I WILL work diligently to provide for the needs of my family.

 

I WILL forgive those who have wronged me and reconcile with those I have wronged.

 

I WILL learn from my mistakes, repent of my sins, and walk with integrity as a man answerable to God.

 

I WILL seek to honor God, be faithful to His church, obey His Word, and do His will.

 

I WILL courageously work with the strength God provides to fulfill this resolution for the rest of my life and for His glory.

 

As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. ---Joshua 24:15

Late Night Blogging

Life, is hard. Life, is an experience. Nothing happens for no reason; this I realized as I slowly grew up. Be it success or failure, up or down, it happens with a purpose, and once you realize the purpose, that's the moment when you lift your hands up and give thanks for everything that has happened.

I grew up, a cheerful, naughty, carefree boy. Somehow things changed, and I, I changed. From that naive little boy to a sentimental, emotional young man. It's weird I know, but that's who I am today, at this moment, and I don't see the point of hiding my personality, my identity. Some might like it, some might loathe it, some might find it interesting, some might find it disgusting; I don't really care. This is who I am, accept me, or leave me. Simple, not complicated.

Certain things in my life have taken a toll on me. Yet certain people in my life have helped me to pick myself up and carry on. And recently, I realized one of my greatest weaknesses, is that I attach my feelings easily. And although a man I am, I feel insecure easily. I can never be too close with a girl without developing feelings for her. In fact, I realized most guys are in a similar situation. It's a struggle, yes it's hard. Not long ago, the pastor in my church talked about honoring the sisters in church, of how we as brothers should treat them. Accountability is a big thing in my church, and I have been reminded more than twice about the mistakes that I have made here and there. I would say that in this case, accountability plays a really big role in correcting myself and keeping myself on the right path.

Always, it's difficult to accept certain things and take them as experiences. It's always easy to complaint, to lament, to indulge in self-pity and pushing oneself down the deepest pit hole in one's life. Yet there are people out there who care. And as I pick myself up again and again, I realize the changes that take place on myself  after every fall. I am forced to conclude that, God breaks us for a reason - to make us stronger and better, to teach us to put hope in Him instead of man, and to give the glory to him no matter what circumstances we might be in.

God I might be weak, but You are strong. God I might be a nobody, but God, You are God. In You I find peace, through You I can do anything. In You I see hope, through You I embrace sufferings. Break me. Shape me. Let the metamorphosis that takes place on me transform me from inside out, and may I be the light and salt on this earth, to bring glory to you, forever and amen.

What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? ~Romans 8:31

A Random Poem

She stood here,
in the cold.
"I'll be there,"
she was told.
Out of nowhere,
hearts went cold.
Tears everywhere,
her trust sold.
Hope's everywhere,
will you be bold?

"Are you sincere,
or is that another blindfold?"

I promise you dear,
before you grow old,
if you persevere,
the truth will unfold.
I'll love you,
many, many fold.

Wrote a random poem at 3 a.m. No idea where the inspiration came from :P

Waiting

A lot of times, I'm not sure if the effort that I put in is worth it or not. But I guess the day will come when I will know, and until then, I just need to hold on.

A Broken Heart

It has been a while. And somehow I let the history repeat. Two people have succeeded in doing this to me. Only two. And you're one of them. Good job.